Coyote continued to walk on the snow-covered trail. As he rounded a bend in the forest, he was surprised to see White Buffalo Woman standing in the path ahead.

“Who is this I see before me?” she asked, “The same Coyote who set out to find fire for his People?”

She studied him quietly for a moment, then said in a whisper, “No…not the same Coyote.”

Coyote opened his mouth to protest that yes, he was indeed the same Coyote who had learned from her at the Cave of the People of the Ashes, but before he could speak, he looked into his own heart and realized that her words were true. He was not the same Coyote. This journey had changed him.

As this knowledge crossed his mind, he looked up to see a smile spreading on White Buffalo Woman’s face.

“Now you are ready to seek the fire,” she said. She motioned for Coyote to follow her.

They walked on for most of the morning until they came to a dense forest. The vegetation here was so thick that the narrow path was barely visible. At the edge of the forest, White Buffalo Woman stopped and turned to face Coyote.

“From this point on, you must walk the path alone. Follow the trail through the forest until you come upon the Tribe of the Fire People. I cannot tell you what is to come. I can only tell you that whatever may happen among the Fire People, you must be true to your own nature in order to survive. Trust your own heart and your own mind and you will know what to do.”

Her words filled him with a sense of foreboding, but at the same time he felt self-assured. After all, everything that had happened on his journey thus far was leading up to this moment. After taking a deep breath, he stepped on the path and into the forest.

The forest was frozen. Snow lay thick upon the ground. Icicles hung from the trees. The further he walked, the darker the path became. The thick vegetation drowned out almost all of the light of the Sun. But his keen eyes guided him, and by and by he came upon a village in the center of the woods.

Though the forest around him was frigid with cold, here in the center of the village there was warmth. As Coyote entered the village, he could see the reason why. The huts had been arranged in circular fashion around a central fire. The fire before him blazed brighter than the Sun. Around that fire danced all manner of creatures, both two-legged and four-legged. The creatures of the air flew above it. A river ran through the center of the village, and the fishes of the river leapt up out of the water and over the fire, their scales sparkling with the reflected light. All manner of insects were there dancing too. Even the serpents danced around the fire in their own fashion, writhing on the ground near the fire circle.

Coyote approached the fire. As he drew nearer he began to dance just like the others. The music was familiar, as if he’d heard it before. He couldn’t seem to help himself as his feet began to move to the beat and the rhythm. For a time he lost himself in the pure joy of the dance, but then he remembered his purpose here and came to his senses.

He decided to steal some of the fire for himself by grasping a twig or branch in his mouth. As he danced through the crowd, inching his way ever closer to the fire, he was almost to the edge of the fire pit when a figure leaped between him and the fire, blocking his path. He looked up to see Coyote Woman standing before him.

At first he didn’t recognize her, because there was something different in her eyes. This was the same Coyote Woman who had tricked him on the trail, yet not the same. She smiled at him and began dancing between Coyote and the sacred fire.

As Coyote Woman danced before him, Coyote returned her smile and joined in the dance. But with each move he was ever mindful of his ultimate goal of stealing a flaming twig from the fire. As he danced with Coyote Woman, he feinted to the left and to the right, always trying to circle around her to get to the fire. But no matter how many tricks he employed she was always one step ahead of him. It was as if she could read his mind, for no matter where he turned he found her between him and his goal.

As they danced together around the fire, it occurred to him that the reason she knew his every move was that she too was a Trickster. She knew every prank, every trick, every deception he could use to his advantage because she possessed the same skills and talents as he. Coyote soon came to realize that the only way to defeat an opponent such as this and to obtain his goal would be to do something completely unexpected and out of character for him.

He pondered what this might be. Then, as he danced with Coyote Woman, he noticed that she always met his face, eye-to-eye. If he danced between her and the fire, she didn’t notice it as long as his gaze met hers. She was ever watchful of his eyes turning away from hers, because that meant he would easily be able to reach into the fire with his teeth and snatch a flaming branch. Any time he turned his gaze away from hers, she leaped between him and the fire. As they spun around and around each other dancing, she did not try to prevent him from turning his back to the fire as long as he looked her in the eye.

With this revelation, he came up with a plan. As they danced around each other, he placed himself between her and the fire, all the while meeting her gaze eye-to-eye. She relaxed because he did not look away. Seeing this, Coyote then put his plan into play. Without looking where he was going, he darted backwards, plunging his tail into the fire. The tip of his fine bushy tail immediately burst into flame. Yelping with pain, Coyote took flight, running away from the fire circle at top speed.

11.0 The Ultimate Boon – Living in True Self

 “All behavior is purposeful if you understand the context.”

– Alfred Adler, founder of the School of Individual Psychology

People do all sorts of crazy things. Some people smoke, some people do illicit drugs, some people engage in risky hobbies like skydiving or rock climbing, some engage in criminal activities, and many participate in behaviors that, to an outside observer, might look downright harmful. Have you ever had a friend or family member who insisted on doing things that were potentially dangerous to themselves or to others?

Adler’s quote above explains such self-harming behaviors.

To someone without a substance abuse problem, it is difficult to understand how someone could abuse dangerous drugs like crack cocaine or methamphetamine. To someone not in the depths of despair and depression, it might be impossible to understand how suicide might look like a viable option to a person locked in their own personal hell. Suicide might even be considered a selfish act to a person who doesn’t understand the harsh effects of depression on the human mind and brain.

The Ultimate Boon is the ‘Holy Grail’ of living in True Self according to your own true nature

But to someone with an addiction problem, or to someone with suicidal tendencies, their behavior makes perfect sense. Perhaps to a person with an addiction, getting high beats the alternative of having to live with overwhelming emotions. Perhaps to a suicidal person, death looks like a more viable option than having to live with overpowering emotional pain. In either case, to the person engaging in the behavior, the behavior makes perfect sense.

Every human being on the planet has experienced occasional feelings of shame, guilt, blame, or inferiority. Such feelings are a natural part of the human condition. They are the source of many of the problems we experience with our relationships, careers, spiritual endeavors, and day-to-day living.

As human beings we’re conditioned to disown certain parts of ourselves. We don’t like to admit our feelings of shame or guilt, because doing so might mean that we are less than perfect. But what does “perfect” really mean?

Try this sometime: Ask three of your closest friends or family members what their idea of the “perfect day” is. I’m willing to bet you’ll get at least three different answers. So if you do get three different answers to the question, “Describe your perfect day,” what does “perfect” really mean?

The obvious answer to this is that the term “perfect” is defined by the individual. This means that your idea of perfect might be completely different from my idea of perfect. Each of us is in charge of what “perfect” means to us.

The good news about this is that if “perfect” is self-defined, and if my own personal idea of what “perfect” means is causing me stress, then I am free to change it at any time. The way to do this is to realize that all of us have feelings of depression, stress or anxiety from time to time. All of us fail to live up to our own expectations for ourselves from time to time. We may choose to beat ourselves up for failing to be “perfect,” or we may choose to realize that as human beings, failing to be “perfect” is a natural part of existence.

By learning to love ourselves “warts and all,” we learn the art of radical acceptance of the True Self.

The next exercise is for determining who you are and what you would like to become. It is designed to help you identify your True Self, and to accept that this is who you are. You may wish to make several copies of the exercise, doing one each week until you complete the course. Notice how your answers change over time.

The last session in this course and in this workbook is Freedom to Live: Living in True Self. You may re-visit the Radical Acceptance of True Self exercise after completing the last session of this workbook as a means of charting your progress over the duration of the course, so you may wish to hang on to your answers as you do this exercise for the first time.

The freedom to live completely and freely in True Self is the Ultimate Boon. It is the purpose of the quest. When we are truly able to connect with our own True Selves we have achieved the pinnacle of existence in the way of life that is ecotherapy. We will have succeeded in completing the journey that is the Way of the Coyote.