A Tale of Two Wolves

An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, “Let me tell you a story. I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those who have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like drinking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings myself many times.” He continued, “It is as if there are two wolves inside me. One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way. But the other wolf is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.”

“Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, “The one I feed.”

A Tale of Two Wolves, from a Cherokee legend as re-told in

The Mindful Mood Management Workbook by Charlton Hall

The more energy we spend on sensing, the less energy we have to spend on thinking. Based on the tale of two wolves above, we could see the two wolves as “thinking wolf” and “sensing wolf.” The more energy you give to sensing wolf, the less energy you give to thinking wolf. The less energy thinking wolf receives, the weaker thinking wolf becomes. Conversely, the more energy sensing wolf receives, the stronger sensing wolf becomes. By shifting from thinking to sensing, you’re not trying to ‘kill’ the thinking wolf. You’re not engaging in doing by trying to make the thinking wolf go away. You’re simply depriving it of energy so that it may eventually go away on its own. Even if it doesn’t go away on its own, you’re not focusing your attention on it. Since your attention isn’t on it, thinking wolf can’t grab you by the throat, refusing to let go.

It could be said that focusing on what your senses are telling you is a type of thinking as well, and that is partially true; however, the difference is that focusing on what your senses are telling you is a type of thinking devoid of emotional content. If you’re in a thinking cycle that is causing you anxiety or depression, then anxiety and depression are emotions. But unless you hate trees for some reason, simply sitting quietly in a forest and observing a tree as if you are an artist about to draw that tree, is an exercise devoid of emotional content. By focusing on the emotionally neutral stimuli found in nature, we give ourselves the opportunity to feed the sensing wolf.

 

School Shootings – Charlton Hall on WSPA Channel 7

Expert advises parents on talking to kids about school shootings

Charlton Hall chairs the behavioral health department at ReGenesis Health Care, and said the school shooting in Parkland, Florida made it to the minds of his patients who’ve dealt with trauma.

“Because it’s just another reminder that the world isn’t always a safe place,” said Hall.

It’s a conversation he said parents need to have in their homes too.

“[Help children] understand that unfortunately, this is the world we live in now and these things do happen,” he said. “The longer you [parents] sweep it under the rug, the more you’re going to have to deal with it at some point in the future.”

Hall advised limiting how much children are exposed to news of these shootings and leave out the graphic details for younger children, while avoiding information they don’t ask for.

“Too much information for a small child would be something like going into graphic detail about what happened, about how many people were killed.Just let them know that something bad happened, and let the child be your guide,” he said. “But, in the same way be realistic. Don’t try to minimize the danger, either.”

He says to remind children school shootings are possible, but not always probable.

“Assure them that they’re safe. Review the procedures with the school,” said Hall “And it’s important that they are looking to you as a role model as well so if they feel stressed out, they’re looking to you as to how to respond to that.”

And, while at their own schools he says kids need to know making threats are never funny.

“If I hear a child making what they think is a joke saying that they’re going to shoot up a school or if a teacher hears that, or any kind of professional who’s a mandated reporter hears that, they’re required by law to report that,” said Hall. “It’s a very serious thing and can impact the rest of your life – it can keep you from getting into college, getting a job.”